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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in A Perfect Red's LiveJournal:

Tuesday, October 12th, 2004
11:13 am
[dzzygirl]
Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers, share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in

But things just get so crazy
Living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road
Get up and go if I knew
That someday it would lead me back to you
That someday it would lead me back to you

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave

Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change of weather, still together when it ends

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave

But things just get so crazy
Living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling, and I'm calling out to you
Singing someday it will bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself back home to you

You may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning...

Current Mood: wistful
Monday, September 13th, 2004
8:00 pm
[blandboringpain]
Cross posted from my journal...
in years to come

i want to take the bullet
the one aimed straight for your heart
i want to meet the wolves halfway
and let them tear me apart
but that's not the way they do it here

i want to lay on the tracks
feel hot steel screaming at me
expose the bones on my back
let me show you what i mean

yeah, it's a different kind of love
i want to climb barbed wire fences
and warm our hands in blood

and this is my gift
asking you to fix
my ruined hands
and it's the gift that keeps on giving
it's the gift that keeps on giving
it's the gift that keeps on giving
and right now it's all i have to give

i want to lay on the tracks
feel hot steel screaming at me
expose the bones on my back
let me show you what i mean
i want to lay on the track
feel hot steel screaming at me
expose the bones on my back
let me show you what i mean

i want to write the perfect song
and play it just for you
while you are tangled up in sleep
i need you more than i'll ever know
until i stop breathing
my lungs will take you for granted

Current Mood: blah
Saturday, September 11th, 2004
2:32 am
[blandboringpain]
cornerstore

they moved down into town
not to be forgotten
to stay around
the jasmine's sweet
the air is complete now

they set up a cornerstore
to try and make their lives
a little more
their girl was blind
but she saw more
than you or me
will ever see

you are the sun
i wanna see everything
i will not run
i wanna be everything in you

they sold bait and fishing string
and groceries and things
everbody's needs
the jasmine's sweet
the air is complete, she said

but lately at the cornerstore
i try and make my life a little more
i hang around to see her
just a little more...
just a litte more...

you are the sun
i wanna see everything
i will not run
i wanna be everything in you

they moved down into town
not to be forgotten
to stay around
the jasmine's sweet
the air is complete, she said

but lately at the cornerstore
we try to make our lives
a little more
i hang around
just a little more...
just a little more...

you are the sun
i wanna see everything
i will not run
i wanna be everything in you

you are the sun
i wanna see everything
i will not run
i wanna be everything in you

Current Mood: tired
Friday, August 27th, 2004
7:26 pm
[dzzygirl]
You've left me now
And it's seasoned my soul
And with every step you take
I watch another part of you go

I continue to build a wall
You were so strong
I fell to my knees
And I don't think I can handle this at all

One more night
I'd like to lie and hold you
Yes and to feel
To make you smile,
I'd like to be there for you
Have you forgotten me?

And the days go by
Doing nothing about them
How much time
Will I have to spend?

My mind won't rest and I don't sleep
Not even in my dreams

If you ever did believe for my sake
If you ever did believe

And the days go by
Doing nothing about them
How much time
Will I have to spend?

Ooo baby don't leave me
I'm down on my knees...
Begging you please...
Baby don't leave me....
Did you ever believe?
7:10 pm
[dzzygirl]
Don't think I ever know
If I ever really want it
Could be why I'm never sure
If I ever really got it
And I guess it's maybe easier
Not to think too much about it...

A house a car a family and friends
Yeah all it means to justify the ends
But sometimes... I wonder...
In the back of my mind
Sometimes... I wonder...
If I'm wasting all my time
Sometimes... I wonder...
If I'm putting off my real life...

What I could've done,
Where I could've been
When I should've gone,
Why I should've seen
Who I would've loved,
How I would've dreamed
And if it's always always too late...

I don't think I ever know
That I ever really need it
Could be why I'm never sure
That I ever really feel it
And I think it's maybe easier
To guess I really mean it...

A house! A car! A family and friends!
Yeah all it means to justify the ends
But sometimes... I wonder...

A girl! A smile! A holiday and sex!
Yeah all it takes
To make sense of the rest
But sometimes... I wonder...
In the back of my mind
Sometimes... I wonder...
If I'm killing all my time
Sometimes... I wonder...
If I'm giving up my real life...

What I could've done,
Where I could've been
When I should've gone,
Why I should've seen
Who I would've loved,
How I would've dreamed
And if it's always, always too late...

And every day that I let slide
Is one day more I never try
To break the world
To make my fate
And with every day that I let go
It's one day less I ever know
If it's always
Always too late...

Current Mood: hopeful
Wednesday, August 25th, 2004
12:51 pm
[dzzygirl]
I was staring at the sky
Just looking for a star
To pray on, or wish on
Or something like that

I was having a sweet fix
Of a daydream of a boy
Whose reality I knew
Was a hopeless to be had

But then the dove of hope began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that my chances were
Approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near, so did a weary tear
I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag

Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love

And I went crazy again today, looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn't stay, wouldn't put his lips to mine,
And a fail to kiss is a fail to cope

I said, "Honey, I don't feel so good, don't feel justified
Come on put a little love here in my void"
He said, "It's all in your head"
And I said, "So's everything'" but he didn't get it
I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy

Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold because these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love

Current Mood: depressed
Tuesday, August 17th, 2004
4:07 pm
[blandboringpain]
little devotional

well, i'm blowing smoke out of your window
and you're slippin' back into your dress
you know you were always such a lady
i've always been impressed
but gentlemen, they don't ask questions
just keep quiet, pay attention
gentlemen, don't ask questions...
we could pay attention...

i said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers
said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers

well, i pictured you in blue
but i have to say
i'm more partial to the red
deep, dark, and devastating
leaving no question as to where you've been
i calm the crowd by keeping quiet
move like a shadow up to your matress
gentlemen, don't ask questions...
we could pay attention...

do you think he'd be better
doing what i do best?
do you think he'd be better
doing what i do best?

i said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers
said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers

do you think he'd be better
doing what i do best?
do you think he'd be better
doing what i do best?

i said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers
said i'm gonna have myself in shambles
phone your folks
they're up and lookin' for some answers

Current Mood: okay
Monday, August 16th, 2004
11:55 pm
[dzzygirl]
To Your Love by Fiona Apple
Here's another speech you wish I'd swallow
Another cue for you to fold your ears
Another train of thought too hard to follow

Chugging along to the song that belongs to the shifting of gears

Please forgive me for my distance
The pain is evident in my existence
Please forgive for my distance
The shame is manifest in my resistance

To your love
To your love
To your love

I would've warned you, but really, what's the point?
Caution could but rarely ever helps
Don't be down when my demeanor tends to disappoint
It's hard enough even trying to be civil to myself

Please forgive me for my distance
The pain is evident in my existence
Please forgive for my distance
The shame is manifest in my resistance

To your love
To your love
To your love

My derring-do allows me to
Dance the rigadoon around you
But by the time I'm close to you
I lose my desideratum and now you, so

Now you have it, so baby tell me what's the word?
Am I your gal, or should I get out of town?
I just need to be reassured
Do you just deal it out, or can you deal with, what I lay down?

Please forgive me, for my distance
The pain is evident in my existence
Please forgive me for my distance
The shame is manifest in my resistance

To your love, to your love, to your love
To your love, to your love, to your love
To your love, to your love, to your love

Current Mood: awake
Thursday, August 12th, 2004
1:00 pm
[blandboringpain]
Cross posted from my journal...
why i don't believe in god

i heard the truth about you
and it really doesn't read at all
like the whipping stick
you raised me with
a scared woman in a private hell
hushed voice like electric bell

strange talk about edgar casey
and the long, lame walk of the dark 70's
strange talk about edgar casey
and the long, lame walk of the dark 70's

i heard the truth about you
yeah, you
mama, they woke me up
i was deep in an idiot sleep
i was just eight years old
heard big words with a horrible sound
why'd they have to call my school
tell me my mother had a nervous breakdown?

i wish i believed like you do
yeah, you
in the myth of a merciful god
in the myth of a heaven and hell
i hear the voices you hear sometimes

sometimes it gets so much
i feel like letting go
sometimes it gets so goddamn hard
i feel like letting it all go
letting it all go...

i ran away, went looking for you
back to culver city
and the old neighborhood
need to know if you were really gone
need to know if you were gone for good

i ran through the projects at night
hide in the dark
from my friends in the light
hide from my brother-in-law
hide from the things he'd say
said you weren't losing your mind
he said you just needed a rest
he said you'd be coming home soon
he said the doctors there
would know what's best
said that maybe i could go
live with them for a while

i know the truth about you...
i know the truth about you...
i know the truth about you...
i know the truth...
i know the truth...
i know the truth...
i know the truth...
i know the truth about you...

mama, they woke me up
i was just eight years old
sometimes it gets so hard
i feel like letting it go
letting it all go...

Current Mood: cranky
12:19 am
[dzzygirl]
Pretty Girl by Sugarcult
Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out what his intentions were about
That's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

She's beautiful as usual with bruises on her ego and
Her killer instinct tells her to beware of evil men
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head
And that's what you get for falling again
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
Love

Pretty girl, pretty girl

Pretty girl is suffering, while he confesses everything
Pretty soon she'll figure out
You can never get 'em out of your head

It's the way
That he makes you cry
It's the way
That he's in your mind
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love

It's the way
That he makes you feel
It's the way
That he kisses you
It's the way
That he makes you fall in love
Love

Current Mood: awake
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